Wondering how our glorious Host Club came to be? Then listen well and come hear our tale:
On the Ides of March a brave new world came unto our existence. We found that the very beginnings of a new world were rooted in the heart of treachery. It standard from within the roots and enveloped everyone around else. A long and brutal civil war broke out! The war was fought long and hard.† It lasted until Robert, the current President, in an attempt to maintain the house on the brink of it falling apart, died.
The alumni came in and reunited the house. They managed to help ensure that the house would not fall in among itself. It was discovered at this time that Technology House had spent all of its black hole into a fund managed by Brendan Hickey. However, Brendan Hickey was no where to be found and thus the house had been Ponzi'd.
The alumni sent Don Engel to President Obama in an attempt to try and get some of the funds from President Obama's bailout budget, however, President Obama did not decide to oblige us. Wanting a share of the cuts from the house, the THAA unveiled a new plan to bring the house up to its full potential. Learning from the mistakes of focusing too much on Technology, they brought to the forefront something that was radical and novel!
The Technology House Host Club was born!
† Andrew, in a fit of truth, fixed for the final time the issue of backspace and it being ^H, changed it on the server. Andrew reversed the Stallman evil for the tradition and felt that all was good. Jimmy, realizing this, went and investigated. He was shocked for such a change to occur was something that seemed contrary to what was Right. So to fight back, he unleashed his fury and did not hold back. Jimmy didn't just remove the Korn Shell, but rather remapped it to Colin's Weenix shell. It slowly escalated, first they fought in irc, then they escalated to the mailing lists. Finally they started using write(1) and ruining each others prompts. This was the xmodmap heard round the world!
At this point, a full civil war slowly began and unfoiled in Techhouse. Head TA vs. TA vs Student, Cousin vs Cousins, Roomates against Roomates, Officer against Officer. Slowly the house began to break down into sides. Unfortunately our records during these times are sparse and we can only chronicle small parts of this tale.
Early during the war was the great ginger offensive. In an attempt to take ouf the stockholds of the 23, there was an epic thing brough on by Haynes. Haynes took an army and raided the kitchen, he broke through the outer defenses, though was repulsed temporairly by a renegade band. Haynes sent out his DDR assault squad, but they came to a standstill against the band. Thus began a long series of trench warfare that would eventually scar all envovled. If it were not for the valient efforts Mat in the Hat, who came out of no where to liberate the ginger opression, the battle may have lasted for more than it did.
Midway through the war was a great betrayl. For the tubes had been held sacred and undamaged. A couragous and yet daring tag team was established. They first broke into the basements of Harkness and began the great and secret rerouting of the tubes. Man in the middle attacks became more prevelant, and some argue that if if were not for the fact that some were prone to keeping the host keys around, all would perhaps have been lost. But instead a valient soul noticed and in his uncertainty distrusted what he saw and thus sparked the graet standoff. Both sides began to realize that they could not use the tubes anymore, and once that happened, suddenly the violence increased in level and strength.
The server then became a battleground for the different factions and in the process they destoyed it. The then President, who had not taken a side in this struggle and was trying to keep the house together, had managed to steal away the back ups such that not all was lost forever. It was her hope that one day they may be able to rebuild once all the damage and the wars had been fought.
However, then began the day, that faithful day that caused many to lay down their arms. For Robert had toured the common rooms and found himself in a great despair. For it seemed as though almost all had been lost and there was going to be little chance to still restore the house to its former glory. He consoled himself to his fate and thus set out to try and reclaim the house that could not be let go of, nor could leave his thoughs, nor her heart.
Deciding not to succumb to the temptaiton of despair, Robert went into the heart of the battle unarmed. Slowly bullets were weaving around Robert and he realized in his hear that there was just one thing left that he could do, only one thing that he could finally reveal or do to try and end the war. Robert began her transformation sequence. It was one of the most beautiful transformation sequences that had been seen in the land, all who were fighting came to witness what was going to come out of it. But he did not have the energy needed to finish it. The fighting of the house had cuased too much pain in her heart to allow the transformation to finish. All who had gathered, saw as Robert slowly fell to the ground unable to move. Robert died for the second time. She slowly came back to life and had the transformation finished. The moon princess departed and left the house to return to the moon. The house would not have their former President again.
It was in this time of grief that the THAA showed up and began an intense and serious reconstruction plan that would transform the house into the future.
